I was recently tagged by Blue of the blog bluelightful, bluelicious, bluelovely to complete a meme on “six unspectacular quirks.” I was a bit hesitant to do the meme, at first, ’cause I figured I’d already done the whole “personal life” update post, and, really, there’s only so many times a week I can talk just about myself before I start making Aditya’s life miserable with a swelled head. “Where’s my tea & biscuits? I need caffeine to post. This is important, Aditya. I’ve been tagged!”
Then I thought about it a bit more, and realized that if I couldn’t come up with six intercultural-type quirks about myself, then all those people who’ve talked about having me committed to an insane asylum for being crazy (I prefer “quirky,” thank you) would be proven wrong. And I’d hate to make so many friends, relatives, and coworkers look bad, so I guess it’s time to roll up my sleeves and show just how quirky in a interculturally-relevant-but-not-culturally-insensitive way I can be. Of course, the qualifier of “unspectacular” means you all will be be missing the good stuff… Anyways, the rules of the meme are as follows:
- Link the person who tagged you.
- Mention the rules in your blog.
- Tell us about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
- Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them.
- Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.
Now, without further ado, let’s get on with goats in sweaters, and five other quirky things.
- For me, India = a goat wearing a sweater
This isn’t meant as a big metaphor, where the goat stands for stubborn, hardy folk with sweet sides, and the sweater is the many religions and traditions of the people, all woven together to protect them in their lives, or anything inane like that. No, for me India will always be mentally associated with a goat wearing a sweater because that’s the first scene I saw there that really struck me as, well, different. Or at least the first thing that I saw while not nearly dead from jet lag. At the time I was zooming down a road in Calcutta, the day of our wedding, serenely watching the morning activities on the street, trying to ignore the fact that I’d soon be dead from a fiery explosion when our driver misjudged his margins by a few centimeters. Then, well, a goat caught my eye. But it wasn’t just any goat. It was a goat in a sweater.* My world flipped. - If I find an excellent ethnic restaurant, I’ll return again. And again and again and again…
I guess I’m just a little OCD when it comes to my food. Or, at least, my ethnic food. If I find a good ethnic place (bonus points if they’re take-out), I’m perfectly happy eating there every night of the week, and order the exact same favorite dish. I would, too, if Aditya didn’t stop me. When we were living 1000 miles apart during my final year of college I took advantage of his absence to order over 100 pounds of TastyBite. I feasted on precooked Indian food every day for over a semester. Now that we’re married, though, he doesn’t let me get away with such stunts – meals at my favorite places (Kabob Palace!!! and the taco!!! place) are carefully rationed. - I get a bit of evil pleasure when people try to connect my last name to my skin tone. Actually, a lot of evil pleasure.
When we got married, I took on Aditya’s last name (my nice, short, Germanic last name got pushed into the middle spot). And, while Aditya’s family name is not one that shouts “Indian!” to all that see it, it’s certainly one that shouts “brown!” (it also apparently shouts “mangle me as best you can!” to everyone). I always get a kick out of watching people when they find out my last name, and try to understand how this seemingly white girl could have a brown last name. The best is with other South Asians – they know my name is Indian, but it’s not a regional- or language-specific name, so they can’t just casually bring up a city or area during conversation. And there are Anglo-Indians out there with as fair as skin as I. One of my Indian doctors this past week during the hospital visit was so curious that he came back to my room just to hesitantly inquire “… about your last name? It’s…?” He was a cool dude, so I just told him the truth, rather than playing dumb to continue my fun. - I enjoy watching cricket.
“What?” you might be saying, “Watching cricket is not a quirk! Over a billion people enjoy watching cricket.” This is true. With its diehard support in India, and lessor support in all of the other former pieces of the British empire, cricket is not a sport which lacks fans. But, Mr. (or Ms.) Smartypants, tell me how many American women who didn’t grow up watching cricket -or even knew anything about the game until they were adults – enjoy watching cricket. Pretty rare, eh? At first I just tolerated the hooting and hollering at three in the morning as India got a 6 (it’s like a super home run). But then I started watching the games… And now I’d say that cricket is now one of my favorite sports, in a three-way tie with football & football. - My favorite outfit to lounge around the house in is the cheap inexpensive salwar kameez I got at Big Bazaar
Big Bazaar is like the Indian version of Walmart – cheap prices, huge selection of about whatever you need. Although they’re a bit classier than Walmart, so maybe Big Bazaar is the Indian version of Target. Anyways, the salwar kameez is a beautiful deep blue-green color with gold embellishments, and totally looks like it cost more than the $2.50 I paid for it. It’s also magically both loose and comfy AND nicely form-fitting so I don’t look like I’m wearing a big green sack. It’s like wearing classy pajamas! - I love drinking in rural German bars, but dislike most American ones
As some of you might remember, I spent the better part of a year in between high school and college working in Germany. Before I went, I had done some drinking, but mostly around my parents, and never that much. Well… In Germany, you can start drinking pretty much as soon as you hit puberty, and no one bats an eye. Of course, you can’t drive until you’re 18, and by that time most teenagers have gotten past the “let’s drink until we make bad decisions” stage**. On the whole, I find it a much more civilized system. Anyways, once I arrived in Germany, the local teenagers (& adults) took me under their wing and taught me a bit about alcohol. (And I’ve been ruined for American beers since.) My favorite part about the whole experience was going to the local bar, where we’d spend the evening playing cards, slowly drinking good beer, and just chatting until no one was sober enough to remember who had won the last hand. It was a very warm, gemütlich atmosphere, and one I’ve been unable to reproduce here in the US.
So there you have it. Six somewhat intercultural unspectacular quirks of mine. Oh, and I tag cagey, Mallika, Mirchi, NeoKalypso, Quirkybook, Quizman, as the last six people who commented here with a public blog (that I know of). Have fun, guys!
* I actually think it’s really sweet that the owner of this goat had put it in this sweater. While I’m not a fan of animals in clothes in general, the balmy 70 degree winter weather was cold to Calcuttans, and I’m sure the owner was just trying to keep his goat warm. Still it was one of those things I had just never imagined before, then boom, there it was in front of me.
**I really do think that the Germans have a much better system with regards to alcohol than American do. Children grow up with the idea of drinking socially (they even get their own little malt “beers”), typically start drinking when their parents are around to supervise, and never feel like they need to sneak around or hide their beer or anything. It’s not a way to rebel, so you don’t see the dangerous binge drinking nearly as often as you see in the US. While it takes awhile for teenagers to learn their limits, they’re typically doing this in a safe environment, where there are older people around who can recognize when to cut someone off. And by the time you’re 18, you’ve already had the experience falling off your bike onto sharp cobblestones once or twice to drive home the message of no drinking & driving. So there are very, very few drunk drivers in Germany (also helps that if you’re caught driving drunk, your license is stripped, never to be returned).
3. June 2008 at 11:13 pm
goat wearing a sweater…….. LOL….. anything can happen in my country
cricket is a cool game and then there is this new format T20 which is making the game even more fun to watch…….
4. June 2008 at 9:56 am
That picture is hilarious!
re: The last name. Our last name is a variation of a pretty common Bengali name (although my husband is not Bengali). He has people start speaking to him in Bengali all the time and has to explain to them that he’s something else. For me, non-Indian people think it’s Italian because it ends in an I, and Indian people get really confused because I’m clearly not Indian (same as you). Actually, funny story — I went to the library over the weekend to get the new Jhumpa Lahiri book. I had put it on hold, so I had to go to the counter to get it. The librarian was an Indian lady, and when I gave her my name and the book title, we had the following conversation:
Librarian: *looks at my name, then at me* “Are you from Calcutta?”
Me: “No.”
Librarian: “Oh, because you’re getting this book, and the author is from Calcutta.”
Me: “No, I just like her books. I read both of her other ones.”
Librarian: “Oh, ok.”
It totally cracked me up that the librarian decided that the practically albino blond girl had to be from Calcutta because she’s reading a book by Jhumpa Lahiri and because her last name sounds like it’s Bengali. LOL
4. June 2008 at 10:49 am
Hey D, I really LOVED the new Lahiri book. Let me know what you think of it— also, I have a little assignment for you over at my blog (re: Gori’s meme)…
4. June 2008 at 12:04 pm
Ha! I think we might have the same last name… I’ve also been mistaken for Muslim/Punjabi/Pakistani/etc etc etc because you’ll find the last name used everywhere…
btw – I’m pretty sure Jhumpa Lahiri is not “from Calcutta”… I think she’s born and raised outside India her whole life…
4. June 2008 at 12:21 pm
That’s true – Lahiri was born in London and grew up in New England. Can’t wait to read that book! I have a hold on it at the library but it hasn’t come in yet.
4. June 2008 at 2:06 pm
That goat is so cute and I LOVED your little metaphor
Im posting mine tonight!
4. June 2008 at 2:40 pm
I only got to read the first 3 pages of the book, but I like it so far!
My quirks are on NK’s blog if anyone’s interested.
4. June 2008 at 9:07 pm
gosh I don’t have a blog.. I want to play the “game” can I? hehehe
5. June 2008 at 7:33 am
Loved that. Typical Calcuttans – the weather turns pleasant and out come the monkey caps and sweaters… I am on the quirks. Mine would have to be quick Indian cooking themed – Natch!
5. June 2008 at 8:26 am
Pale-Desi I was totally thinking of you when I listed my six…yes PLEASE do the little meme thing!!! You can go over to my blog and list yours if you like!!!
I think we should all read Lahiri’s book and have an online book club…hehe
5. June 2008 at 12:29 pm
@ NK Oh.. yay! I’ll post my six your site then!
I think its a great idea to do an online book club… but which Lahiri book are we talking about? I’ve not read any of her books. I’ve just seen namesake.
5. June 2008 at 1:13 pm
Oh, I’ve been tagged. Will update my blog in 1 or 2 days.
5. June 2008 at 9:38 pm
Im just surprised you ate 100 lbs of Tastybite and lived to tell the tale…. {Gag}
6. June 2008 at 9:46 am
P_D – The Lahiri book we’re referencing is Unaccustomed Earth, which is her new one. If you haven’t read her others (Interpreter of Maladies and The Namesake), you really should! The movie of The Namesake was very good, but you really get a lot more out of the book. Both IoM and UE are short stories, so they’re pretty easy reads. And, IoM won the Pulitzer, so you know it’s good. I’m 10 pages into UE and it’s just as great as the others, so far.
16. June 2008 at 1:31 pm
Just wanted to report back that I finished Unaccustomed Earth. I liked it, but have come to the realization that Lahiri just does not write stories with happy endings. I wish she would on occasion!
17. June 2008 at 8:53 am
OMG D…ditto. R and I both read it and were like GEEEEZ can you just ONCE give us a happy ending?! Though always illuminating, her stories tend to be very dense and filled with pangs sadness.
Little update: R’s going to ask his parents when they want to meet me this week
. I’m game for whenever and I have no anger to report about the process so far …. who knows maybe things will turn out really…well?! 
17. June 2008 at 8:55 am
(Ha…I have enough other things to be angry about in life anyway…maybe I should write a post on it
) …but in general, the Indian parent stuff hasn’t riled me all up (even though they aren’t too keen on the *idea* of me still).
17. June 2008 at 4:08 pm
Wait – no one’s allowed to discuss UE until I get my hands on it!
And I know her short stories are often sad, but “The Namesake” had a happy ending (at least to me it was happy). Definitely pangs of deep sadness, but also a lot of hope and appreciation for the complex beauty of life.
NK – Good luck with the parents! I think you are well prepared and will surprise them. My future sis-in-law just told me the story of how she and her white husband came to be together. I always thought my future-in-laws were open-minded from the get-go, but they weren’t happy that she was dating him and urged her to break it off with him multiple times. They couldn’t imagine how he would fit into their community and into Indian culture. But he won them over and now they adore him. The story of his proposal and what he went through to get her to agree to marry him is amazing (and funny too). I should type it up sometime and share it with you guys.
18. June 2008 at 3:20 pm
@ Sachin: I love twenty20′s! Was super happy when India won the World Cup there. I haven’t been following the IPL that much, though.
@ D: that’s a great story!
@ Mirchi: awwwe, don’t hate on the TastyBite. Some are pretty icky, but some (Madras Lentils) are SOOO good. And it’s a healthier quick meal than fast food.
@ NeoKalypso: glad to hear about the progress with the parents.
Aditya just bought me Unaccustomed Earth – gotta read it before the new job starts up.
1. September 2008 at 6:34 am
I do love the look on people’s faces when they see my last name.. I can’t begin to tell you how many times I’ve been in a line at the bank or store and an Indian clerk will hold up the line to start a conversation with me about how I ended up with such a name! They always seem so excited about it when I explain I married an Indian… then they start in on the customary barrage of questions.. Have I been to India? Do I know Hindi? Do I cook Indian food? Do my inlaws live with us?
I usually answer all the questions politely, but I’m sure the people in line behind me want to pull their hair out!
2. September 2008 at 3:21 pm
Hi Ms. Kumar, and welcome to the blog!
I know exactly what you mean regarding the “barrage of questions.” My favorite: “You don’t find Indian food too spicy?” said in an incredulous tone of voice. Little do they know that they’re talking to the girl who grew up eating onions raw and dumping wasabi onto everything.
31. December 2009 at 6:32 pm
The goat is wearing a sweater because it lost one of its legs.