Tag Archive | "culture"
Germany and Leaves: Social Norms
The autumn season is upon us here in Virginia - the leaves have turned bright yellow, orange, red, and cover our yard and front walk in a multicolored carpet. All I can think is that I'm so glad I don't live in Germany anymore.
Continue reading...When in Rome, Do As the Romans Do… Sometimes
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Most of my American friends live in horror of being that American tourist when traveling abroad. We've all heard the horror stories of the rude American traveler who behaved in a completely culturally insensitive way while traveling, working, or living abroad. The person who tromps into a Japanese house wearing his shoes. Or complains loudly about the stupidity of grocery stores being closed in Germany on a Sunday. No one wants to be that person, right? In an effort to not be that person, friends have told me they try their darnedest to follow that age old maxim: when in Rome, do as the Romans do - i.e. follow the customs of the land and culture that you find yourself in, even if they aren't your customs. Nothing wrong with trying to be respectful in all ways possible of other cultures, right? Well, no - there are some things wrong with that old rule about following other culture's customs as much as possible. My main complaint with the "when in Rome" adage is that it simplifies a topic that defies simplification. Tossing the rule out in a conversation as a simple, true fact (as happened recently in the comments section at another blog that inspired this post) strikes me as similar to slapping a bandage on what is, in fact, a thorny issue. Sometimes it's a good idea to follow the customs and traditions of another society while you're visiting (or living in) it. But sometimes it's a really bad idea.
Continue reading...To Hug or Not to Hug: More on Meeting the Parents
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Aditya's parents are visiting us again for the second time - they arrived late last week - which has cut into my blogging time as we catch up with them. Of course, it also means plenty of blogging material is being generated with our temporary extended family living situation. The last time they visited I only got out one substantive post on the topic - I hope to do a bit better this time. Of course, that post - which was on the (eek!) order that Aditya's parents tried to bring to our home, disrupting my chaotic-but-somehow-functional mess of a system - still haunts us. Today Baba and Maa dusted and vacuumed the house while we at work - and then jokingly pointed out after I arrived home that my piles of mess were exactly where I left them, just cleaner. (Little do they know that if I am stymied in blogging about their dastardly actions of cleaning our house & cooking delicious meals I have no problem in getting irrationally upset about some other minor issue. For example: the fridge has been reorganized without my express permission, and the dishwasher was inefficiently loaded, resulting in one less cup being washed than if I had loaded it. I'm still reeling!) Since I haven't had a chance to sit down and think through a post lately, I thought I'd share with you the transcript I've typed up in spare minutes from an NPR segment called Intercultural Relationships: Can They Work?. I'm not a professional transcriber, so there may be errors - but I figured something was better than nothing for those of you who can't (or don't like to) listen to podcasts. The segment (and my post title) was developed from an article in East West Magazine. The article, which you can find here, is quite complimentary to the NPR segment, and I encourage you to read it as well as the transcript below. I've bolded the parts I find particularly interesting, and will post my thoughts on it tomorrow in the comments section.
Continue reading...From Atheist to Hindu? Religion and My Intercultural Marriage
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Me? Oh, well, I don't have a faith. And, no, I'm not interested in getting one either. That was my polite non-answer when asked about my religious beliefs by two Christians who stopped by Aditya's and my doorstop to proselytize last weekend. And it was as true, as far as it goes - I'm not one much for simple faith in any context. When discussing my religious beliefs with friends & family, I'm most likely to to describe myself simply as an atheist. But when I'm feeling a little mischievous - or argumentative - I'll sometimes put in that I'm an atheist - and a Hindu. Yeah, it's a bit of a complicated situation; I blame Aditya for it completely. Like many other things in my life, religion is something that has become more complicated since we set off on our intercultural marriage adventure.
Continue reading...Intertwined Utility Functions – the Economics of Relationships
Thursday, May 21, 2009
The study of economics screws up your brain. Or, at least, that's what people outside the field who haven't drunk the econ kool-aid tell me. (Like most potentially insane people, I, of course, wouldn't know if I were in fact insane. That's the fun of it!) Anyway, I'm informed that most people don't think about romantic relationships in terms of intertwined, interdependent utility functions. But I do. And I think you should consider the idea too. Think of it as practice in learning how a subculture (a geeky, mathematically-inclined subculture) thinks about love and romance.
Continue reading...Cultural & Religous Differences: Understanding, Accepting, Embracing
Friday, February 13, 2009
Today I'd like to discuss three good ways of dealing with differing cultural and religious traditions - understanding them, accepting them, or embracing them - and why it's perfectly okay to not embrace - or even accept - any tradition you find difficult or troubling, as long as that works for your particular relationship.
Continue reading...The Intercultural Learner
Monday, February 9, 2009
The quote I've been considering all weekend: "The intercultural learner moves amongst cultures, in a process of continual negotiation, learning to cope with the inevitable changes, in a manner that is ultimately empowering and enriching. The home culture is never denied nor demeaned, yet the intercultural learner will find his or her attitudes and beliefs challenged by contact with others and the process of interaction will lead to the kind of personal growth characterized by 'progressive' curricula." (J. Corbett 2003) Corbett writes this within the context of explaining good intercultural education, which he describes as neohumanist, for it "places respect for individuals and their many cultures at the heart of its enterprise". Thoughts?
Continue reading...Becoming an Intercultural Communicator
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
My husband and I don't speak a common language. Never have, never will. Sure, I'm a native English-speaker, born & raised in America, and Aditya grew up speaking English both in the home and at school - and he even majored in English Literature at the Midwestern university we both attended. Nonetheless, we will always be shouting to each other across a ravine - a gap created by our different cultures. Those of your who are in an intercultural relationship - or who interact regularly with people from a different culture, as I discussed last post - know that this gap goes far beyond the ones created by so-called gender wars, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" talk, the accents or incomplete vocabularies of non-fluent speakers , or even the basic idea from philosophy of language that no person can know exactly what you're thinking in your head. The culture we grew up with inevitably affects the framework of the world we perceive - and thus the world we communicate to and with. Lest I end up sounding too pessimistic, however, let me hasten to add that that the difference in world views created by dissimilar cultures isn't insurmountable. Sure, you're never going to completely conquer the gap between two cultures - but every little bit helps! Today's post is on one of those little bits that help. Or maybe it's a big bit - I'll let you decide.
Continue reading...Cross-Cultural Connections in your Community
Monday, January 26, 2009
I share my office with a Chinese-American man. My team at work consists of said office mate, an Indian-American (Gujarati) guy, a Turkish fellow, a white dude from the Midwest, my Taiwanese female boss, and three Indians in our Delhi office (two Mr.'s and a Ms.). The offices closest to mine include said Turkish fellow, a Bangladeshi bloke, an Indian (Bengali) lady, a Ghanaian-American gent, a French woman, and a Nepalese chap. Really. For those of you keeping count, that's two Caucasian Americans (including myself) out of fourteen folk. With numbers like those, as you may guess, I don't talk to white Americans all that much while at work. (Or women, either - but that's what you get for working in a field dominated by economists and engineers.) However, even when I step outside the office, I've found that I don't interact with a many people - or, really, more than a handful of people - who appear to be from the same general cultural & racial background as my own. Frankly, it's a little odd now that I think about it.
Continue reading...Wait… I Thought This Was MY House!
Friday, August 29, 2008
Aditya and I have both been pulling long hours at work during the past couple of weeks. Frankly, it's rare that we both get home before the night sets in. While we both have careers that have require long hours (my company's motto: "the hours here are flexible; you can come in as early as you want, and leave as late as you want"), recent project disasters have stretched our workdays beyond our version of normal. This is particularly unfortunate as Aditya's parents, Maa & Baba, are currently visiting us from India. Of course, they are here for two months, so it's not as if we won't end up having plenty of family time together - but I do wish they didn't have to spend so much time at our house by themselves. I worry about them getting bored; even Kajol, the energizer puppy, can only go for so many walks. I fret about all the interesting monuments and historic sites we aren't seeing in the evenings for lack of energy and sunlight. And I'm genuinely distraught that, at some point, they might break The System while we're away at the office.
Continue reading...© 2010 Gori Girl. Powered by Wordpress.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
6 Comments