Photo Credit: A Mother’s Heart Photography
The autumn season is upon us here in Virginia – the leaves have turned bright yellow, orange, red, and cover our yard and front walk in a multicolored carpet.
All I can think is that I’m so glad I don’t live in Germany anymore.
Germans, you see, are expected by their neighbors to clear the fallen leaves from the sidewalk in front of their house. And the gutters. And the front yard. The driveway, if there is one. Daily. Or, at least, that was the expectation in the hamlet I lived at in Northern Germany for the year I was working as an au pair. During that fall, though, I thought of my title as less “Au Pair Extraordinaire” and more as “Girl Chasing After Leaves Every. Freaking. Day. (Extraordinaire)”. I swept up a lot of leaves, secretly thinking the social rule doof (stupid or daft). Still, it was the custom of the land. The neighbors would have thought it incredibly rude if the family I was working for didn’t keep the area in the front of their house clean of leaves as much as possible – nearly as rude as running the loud lawnmower or vacuum on a Sunday, when neighbors nearby are meant to be relaxing together in quiet harmony, like all German families. The shops close on Sundays, in fact, to enforce this family bonding time (or so I was told).
Social customs regarding what is and isn’t polite behavior is such an odd thing – especially when they aren’t your culture’s customs, eh? Learning about other cultures’ understanding of “correct” social interaction makes one realize just how constructed – and arbitrary – many social rules are.
4. November 2009 at 2:36 am
Shops are closed (and you shouldn’t mow your lawn) on sundays in France as well… It’s not so much to “enforce” family time, as to ensure everyone can spend a day together if they want to. Sundays do remain this sacred relaxing and family/ friends time.
Actually, there was a major outcry in France recently, because the law changed to allow more shops to open on sundays. Let’s not even mention what was said when Sarkozy had some shops on the Champs Elysées open on a sunday for Michelle Obama’s visit
She on the other hand, couldn’t believe that most shops on that avenue are closed every sunday…. It is in fact half dead on those days!
As you say, social norms…
5. November 2009 at 12:32 pm
My French host father taught me a bit about the culture at the dinner table… “RESPECTEZ le fromage!” mmmmmm fromage… that’s a cultural norm I can sink my teeth into!
5. November 2009 at 12:46 pm
I had to google fromage to figure out what it is. :blush:
6. November 2009 at 6:49 am
It’s true that Sundays are for family (and friends) here in France. But I always have to laugh a little when I think about this:
Sunday might be for family, but Saturday sure isn’t, because you’re forced to get up bright and early and run all over town, making sure to get to all the stores and stock up on whatever you might need for the next one-and-a-half days (here a lot of the stores close by 1 p.m. on Saturday). It makes Saturdays so hectic you NEED the next day to relax!
I had no idea about the leaves in Germany. I don’t think I’ve seen anyone, anywhere, rake or clean up leaves here in France.
17. November 2009 at 10:38 pm
How was your au pair experience? One of my students is actually an au pair and she’s struggling a lot with her family. I always thought being one myself would be a great way to get out of the country, but there’s a lot that could go wrong too and that keeps me yet from checking further into it.
27. November 2009 at 5:53 pm
I absolutely adored my au pair experience, but I think it’s all about the connection between the particular family & au pair. If we ever end up with two kids pre-school we’ll probably consider getting an au pair rather than day care.
28. September 2010 at 7:17 pm
Hi, I just finished my au pair experience in beautiful California. I absoulutely loved it. It was one of my best years in my life so far. I liked the fact, that you have opportunity to travel and meet people from all over the world.. I personally, grew as a person a lot.. It was a very enriching experience to me and now I have different and bigger visions of life. I would definitely do it again, even though it was not always easy…
I also wanted to say, I am originally from Austria, and we use to have our shops on sundays closed too. I think it is not so bad. We all can live one day without a grocery store… I guess. And besides that, the girl from the supermarket can also party on saturday night like everybody else, because she does not have to work on sunday..