Gori Girl

Greetings Jal,

Speaking as an Indian guy who was born and raised here in the U.S., you have a rather tough battle ahead.  Indian families are all about empty emotions and guilt trips and will do anything from threatening your loved one with abandonment and social ostracization to even threatening to commit suicide if he were to marry an "American."  The question you need to ask is whether he is worth it or not.  The emotional pain that is involved will not be easy.  I do not mean to frighten but to inform you.  You can win, and there is always hope, but both parties have to put all their cards out on the table.  If your boyfriend/fiance is harboring any emotions of uncertainty, doubt and a sense of wanting to go back to his family and let them decide his future, then you need to confront him about it.  You cannot fight this war alone.  "A house divided cannot stand" were not just empty words from one of our greatest leaders, but something that is known since the concept of family was known to mankind.  I think it is wise to start to know your enemies and learn as much about the culture as you possibly can.  I come from a Gujarati background, so I cannot relate that much to Telugu, but I can say that most Indian sects and partitions have a sense of pride and vanity in their traditions and cultures that blinds them to all, including the love interest of their beloved children.  If the worst comes, you will have to ask a very tough, emotionally painful question to your man: "Will it be me or your family?"  I only mean this as an absolute total last resort.  I wish you the very best.  Take heart, just as sjtp has said earlier, that there have been many matriarchs who have walked before you and have layed out a path of strength and hope and all that you have to do is reach out. 

Wish you the best,

Kratos